Inspired to Write

During a recent visit with a friend, Austin was inspired to write a prologue to accompany her brilliant fantasy story. She offered him her iPad, and he busily typed away for about 30-45 minutes.

Today, Austin and I worked together on a first revision of his writing. Halfway through this exercise, Austin wanted to stop - revision seems to be quite the opposite of inspiring!

Here are the first two drafts of Austin's prologue:

Austin's Story prologue.

1. First draft

It was night in terraplenta but in this part it was always dark

This part of terraplenta was called the black mountains

The reason it is called the blackmountins is the inhabitants here are dragons

.These are no ordinary dragons that breath fire and horde treasure no

These dragons brethe darkness a darkness that can even consume the soul

 one day in the nere by village of

Ignea little did the dragon know that the village was preparing to driVe them

from the black mountains . The dragons awoke with a start at first they

Thought it was visitors coming early after all the black mountains are the only

Safe haven for dragons. When they saw what had cosed the commotion

They were startled to see a army from ignea the closest fairy village they

Were cot off garde the dragons fled with the chief taiking up the rear

The chief stoped suddenly as he herd the ditresed call of his offspring

He rushes back to the den only to find them dead and his mate had suffered

the same fate they fled the black mountains as they got further away the

Black mountains That he called there kingdom vanish from sight.that night the

chief made a Vow to destroy the ones who killed his family.

2. Second draft (focus on spelling and punctuation)

It was night in Terraplenta, but in this part it was always dark. This part of Terraplenta was called the Black Mountains.

The reason it is called the Black Mountains is the inhabitants here are dragons. 

These are no ordinary dragons that breathe fire and horde treasure. 

These dragons breathe darkness, a darkness that can even consume the soul.

One day, in the nearby village of Ignea, little did the dragons know that the village 

was preparing to drive them from the Black Mountains. The dragons awoke with a start. At first, they thought it was visitors coming early. After all, the Black Mountains are the only safe haven for dragons. When they saw what had caused the commotion, they were startled to see an army from Ignea, the closest fairy village. They were caught off guard. The dragons fled with the chief taking up the rear. The chief stopped suddenly as he heard the distressed call of his offspring.

He rushed back to the den only to find them dead and his mate had suffered

the same fate. They fled the Black Mountains. As they got further away, the

Black Mountains that he called their kingdom, vanish from sight. That night, the chief made a Vow to destroy the ones who killed his family.